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The International
This conspiracy thriller starring Clive Owen and Naomi Watts never gets past second gear.
"...corporations, military juntas, Hezbollah, drug cartels, the Mafia, the Illuminati, possibly the Masons and the Elks, and on and..."

Feb. 13, 2009 Movie Review by Josh Rosenblatt

Lara Croft: Tomb Raider
"...revolving around Lara's unresolved Electra complex and the dreaded Illuminati, that mythological one-world-government cabal that these days can't even..."

June 15, 2001 Movie Review by Marc Savlov

On the Run with Jay & Bey
First couple of hip-hop’s cinematic ruse – or was it!?
"...Shortlist of the Illuminati You could go down a four-day Internet rabbit hole..."

May 22, 2014 Music Post by Abby Johnston

SXSW Interview: Alt-J
Thursday, March 14, 11:10pm, Belmont
"..."I promise we're not part of the Illuminati. We're not prolific enough for that," laughs Alt-J keyboardist..."

March 15, 2013 Music Feature by Abby Johnston

SXSW Unveils Third Artist List
Bedouine, Priests, Mystery Lights, Kokoko!, and 297 more
"...include magic singer Erin Rae, emotionally compelling indie rockers Illuminati Hotties, Father/Daughter Records pop savant Sir Babygirl, and Americana..."

Jan. 9, 2019 Music Post by Kevin Curtin

24 Diner x Bell’s Brewery: Illuminatily Delicious
Michigan-based beercrafters supercharge the succulence
"...coincidences, getting a glimpse of the gears that the Illuminati turn as they crank the engine of this world..."

July 26, 2018 Food Post by Wayne Alan Brenner

News Ticker: August 9
All the news that's fit to blog
"...profiteer Alex Jones makes up some story involving the Illuminati, Leslie Cochran, and Screech from Saved by the Bell,..."

Aug. 9, 2013 News Post by Brandon Watson

Alt-J’s Awesome SXSW Wave
UK buzz band storms ‘trip-folk’?
"...is the whole triangle thing with the band an Illuminati reference?..."

March 14, 2013 Music Post by Abby Johnston

The Crazies
A mysterious pollutant in their water supply is making the residents of a small Iowa town insane in this remake of George Romero's topical horror tale.
"...b) the corporatization of our own government, c) the Illuminati, d) us, e) all of the above. If you..."

March 5, 2010 Movie Review by Marc Savlov

Angels & Demons
The chase is on, but there's no Holy Grail to be found in this suspenseless trail of decoded symbols.
"...pope – are kidnapped. All signs point to the Illuminati; to prove science's superiority over religion, the secret sect..."

May 15, 2009 Movie Review by Kimberley Jones

Levitation’s Insane 2024 Lineup Includes the Jesus Lizard, Slowdive, and Gang of Four
Psychedelic festival returns October 31 to November 3
"...jump-started the genre’s 2010s revival. The Sword, Pentagram, Airiel, Illuminati Hotties, Nilüfer Yanya, Glare, Rickshaw Billie’s Burger Patrol, Farmer’s..."

June 27, 2024 Music Post by Carys Anderson

Theatre Review: Trinity Street Playhouse’s A Million More to Go
Play examines preposterous political climes with chuckles galore
"...letters were objects like a Chinese flag, a hand-drawn Illuminati symbol, and a vowel list with no O. The..."

June 21, 2024 Arts Feature by Cat McCarrey

30 Breakout Music Acts to See in Austin This Week
Your guide to SXSW's buzziest artists, both official and unofficial
"...album Going Through It, enhanced by producer Sarah Tudzin (illuminati hotties, boygenius). McLamb’s lyrics remain blunt and untouched, moving..."

March 11, 2024 SXSW Post by Rachel Rascoe

The Chronicle Guide to the Marvel Cinematic Universe
As the Guardians of the Galaxy gather once more, every MCU film reviewed
"...John Krasinski as Reed Richards and one-fifth of the Illuminati...."

May 5, 2023 Screens Post by Richard Whittaker

The Union of Musicians and Allied Workers Demands Higher Pay at South by Southwest
120 artists including Fugazi’s Guy Picciotto, Eve 6, & Zola Jesus sign
"...Zola Jesus, Speedy Ortiz, Downtown Boys, Half Waif, and Illuminati Hotties...."

Feb. 7, 2023 Music Post by Rachel Rascoe

The Luv Doc: A Good Person
The Achilles heel of COVID is that it's not deadly enough to get the attention of the real knuckle draggers
"...the worst fucking advertisement for bone broth Madison Avenue illuminati could ever dream up. He looks like a Butterball..."

May 21, 2021 Column by The Luv Doc

The Perfect Date Night Is In the Details
A sort of recipe for showing your beloved (and yourself) some love
"...QAnon stan might cover their noggin to keep the Illuminati’s psi-cooties away, perhaps, but here the wrapping’s done to..."

Sept. 22, 2020 Food Post by Wayne Alan Brenner

The Luv Doc: A Bad Case of ZTSD
The Luv Doc has a fat Santa's bag of helpful advice
"...your embarrassed house cat. I am mostly sure the Illuminati won't secretly be recording you through your webcam. If..."

June 12, 2020 Column by The Luv Doc

Willie Nelson’s Luck Reunion 2019
"...Illuminati Hotties..."

March 15, 2019 Photo Gallery

15 Movies We Can’t Wait to See at SXSW 2019
A few words about some of our favorite films coming to the fest
"...the proto-atomic family father, the Ward Cleaver of the Illuminati appear from …?..."

March 7, 2019 SXSW Post by The Screens Staff

Bow Down and Pay Up for J.R. “Bob” Dobbs and the Church of the SubGenius
The power of slack compels you in this SXSW documentary
"...the proto-atomic family father, the Ward Cleaver of the Illuminati appear from ......."

March 8, 2019 Screens Feature by Richard Whittaker

Faster Than Sound: 15 SXSW Buzz Bands to Cure Millennial Burnout
By legs, Lyft, or Lime scooter, get to the following 15 acts
"...Texan folk force Jess Williamson, Rico Nasty, Priests, Ratboys, Illuminati Hotties, and Sidney Gish, among others. Atlanta indie establishment..."

March 8, 2019 Music Column by Rachel Rascoe

The True Story of the Somewhat Lost Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Matthew McConaughey and Renée Zellweger star in this largely forgotten sequel
"...cats' paws to a far more villainous set: the Illuminati, or some simulacrum thereof...."

Dec. 21, 2018 Screens Feature by Marc Savlov

ACL Review: Tove Lo
Swedish sensation bares all
"...This comes as no surprise considering the singer’s Swedish illuminati status in hit-maker Max Martin’s songwriting collective, Wolf Cousins...."

Oct. 15, 2017 Music Post by Rachel Rascoe

Top 10 Local Video Games
From majestic vistas to mundane offices, it's time to play
"...quick-play mobile dungeon crawler, but beware its depths. Taco Illuminati; for iOS and Android; Free 4) Into..."

Dec. 30, 2016 Screens Feature by James Renovitch

Page Two – Alex Jones: Demon Hunter
“Clinton and Obama stink of sulfur, so they must be demons”
"...say she's a demon seems as likely as the Illuminati reaching out to him to join, tempting him with..."

Oct. 21, 2016 Column by Louis Black

ACL Review: Jazz Cartier
Loose cannon rap punk could be the anti-Drake
"...His earnest delivery ricocheted between the heavy-lidded lothario in “Illuminati Love Song,” party cacophony in “Red Alert,” and the..."

Oct. 2, 2016 Music Post by Alejandra Ramirez

Page Two: When Pointing an Accusatory Finger, Three More Point Back at You
This ugly political season grows ever more vicious
"...or Republican parties, the New World Order or the Illuminati. It is not them, it is us, the American..."

Aug. 19, 2016 Column by Louis Black

Page Two: It's the Time of the Season for Absolute Moral Certainty
The "Anybody but Hillary" movement makes strange bedfellows of the progressive left and the hard right
"...traffic jams are not because of evil people, the illuminati, agents of the devil, or suicidally determined crazed anarchists,..."

July 22, 2016 Column by Louis Black

Gay Place
It's been a couple of big weeks for the pair behind Austin's beloved GayBiGayGay
"...does more than hang on walls. Expect performance, queer illuminati, and snacks (duh). GAYDAR..."

May 6, 2016 Column by Sarah Marloff

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