Bates Recital Hall
No One Can Change Men but Men
RECEIVED Mon., Sept. 13, 2010
Dear Editor,
Re: “Sex Offenders Exposed” [News, Sept. 10]: I am a licensed psychologist with experience in treating numerous victims of sexual abuse and exploitation; I have also taught human sexuality in the Department of Education Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin for more than 13 years. The topic of sexual coercion is very important to me and occupies a considerable portion of my energy as a teacher. I would like to express an opinion.
In the entire history of Western culture as far as I have studied it, the sexuality of the human male is widely deemed to be without conscience, and, if left to its own devices, completely out of control. Men are stereotyped as walking erections who would "f--k mud." Even psychology's "theory du jour," evolutionary psychology/psychobiological theory" (Buss, et al.) puts men in the position of being obliged to spread their DNA as far and as widely as possible. Middle-aged men owe it to the species to reproduce with 22-year-old females of the requisite waist-to-hip ratio – rape as a "reproductive strategy," etc. (It is not as though the theorists expect men to behave in these ways, it is simply that these approaches are, heh-heh, well understood.)
We assume that male humans are sexual predators. As women, we would go out of our way not to be alone on a dark street with one of them. If accused of rape, we assume they are guilty. Many of my female students, for example, express curiosity as to the appeal of having sexual intercourse with an unconscious woman. Roofies, anyone?
Here's the problem: I don't see men doing a whole lot to undo those stereotypes. As I say to my students every semester: No one can change these stereotypes except men. And not enough of them are stepping up.
If enough good men become tired of the stereotypes about their gender, they will fight to change them – no doubt being accused of being pussies all the way. It sucks to need men's voices to say, "Sexual assholism is unacceptable," but until men change the image, it will remain. Y'all are dangerous, lifetime dangerous, permanently dangerous.
No one can change that but men. How 'bout it?
Re: “Sex Offenders Exposed” [News, Sept. 10]: I am a licensed psychologist with experience in treating numerous victims of sexual abuse and exploitation; I have also taught human sexuality in the Department of Education Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin for more than 13 years. The topic of sexual coercion is very important to me and occupies a considerable portion of my energy as a teacher. I would like to express an opinion.
In the entire history of Western culture as far as I have studied it, the sexuality of the human male is widely deemed to be without conscience, and, if left to its own devices, completely out of control. Men are stereotyped as walking erections who would "f--k mud." Even psychology's "theory du jour," evolutionary psychology/psychobiological theory" (Buss, et al.) puts men in the position of being obliged to spread their DNA as far and as widely as possible. Middle-aged men owe it to the species to reproduce with 22-year-old females of the requisite waist-to-hip ratio – rape as a "reproductive strategy," etc. (It is not as though the theorists expect men to behave in these ways, it is simply that these approaches are, heh-heh, well understood.)
We assume that male humans are sexual predators. As women, we would go out of our way not to be alone on a dark street with one of them. If accused of rape, we assume they are guilty. Many of my female students, for example, express curiosity as to the appeal of having sexual intercourse with an unconscious woman. Roofies, anyone?
Here's the problem: I don't see men doing a whole lot to undo those stereotypes. As I say to my students every semester: No one can change these stereotypes except men. And not enough of them are stepping up.
If enough good men become tired of the stereotypes about their gender, they will fight to change them – no doubt being accused of being pussies all the way. It sucks to need men's voices to say, "Sexual assholism is unacceptable," but until men change the image, it will remain. Y'all are dangerous, lifetime dangerous, permanently dangerous.
No one can change that but men. How 'bout it?
Nancy P. Daley, Ph.D.
Adjunct Assistant Professor, Educational Psychology
The University of Texas at Austin
Adjunct Assistant Professor, Educational Psychology
The University of Texas at Austin
