Liked Play, Doesn't Like Sponsor

RECEIVED Wed., Aug. 13, 2003

Dear Zilker Hillside Theater:
    I attended the closing night of your musical Crazy for You, and was astounded at the sheer quality and hard work that went into this production. Everything was top-notch: the musicians, actors, the dancing (it can't be easy getting 50 or so people to tap-dance the same rhythm). Bravo, ladies and gentlemen!
    However, I was a little saddened to see that one of your sponsors was the Altria corporation. In the future, if at all possible, could you find it in your heart to decline any future sponsorship by the Altria corporation? Altria is the recently renamed Phillip Morris company. (Those wacky jokesters who bring you such kid-friendly products like Marlboro and Winston cigarettes, ya know?)
    Perhaps you were unaware that they had changed their name. I'm not faulting you for innocently taking whatever sponsorship you can get, but if it's possible to forego their money this year, I'm sure you could find another sponsor that doesn't reek of sulfur and brimstone. I look forward to next year's production!
cough cough,
Tim Girardot
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