You can do a lot in VR these days: fall, fly, or float. But as we learned in the 1992 film Lawnmower Man there’s at least one more thing, which was the topic of Friday's VR Porn panel, part of SXSW's fledgling VR/AR track. Of course, we don’t really have to tell you that do we? Kidding! We all know you weren’t there. (Wink!)

Today’s five-person panel of engineers, analysts, and designers working on the Mars 2030 virtual reality experience has some good news and some bad news. First, the bad news: You’re not going to Mars. Not really. Now the good news: Some top minds are working on the next best thing.

It’s been a minute since I laughed as hard as I did - soberly and with focus - at the performances in SXSW Comedy’s Completely Official Showcase of Comedy. Hosted by L.A.'s Megan Gailey, the show featured two of comedy's most respected Todds (Barry and Glass), Kaufman-esque opener Joe Pera, and Nate Bargatze.

"It’s funny that the show is called Take My Wife and then we’re all white guys.” Those words came from Moshe Kasher, whose mini-set for SXSW Comedy absolutely destroyed at Esther’s Follies Saturday night.

“I joke about ‘not giving a fuck’ as a good business model – but it’s true,” said Anthony Bourdain to a big laugh. The host of CNN’s Parts Unknown and unqualified rock star elucidated with an honest-to-goodness candor, built through his experiences and travels.

An hour was not nearly enough to cover the expansive – and progressively treacherous – terrain related to league/player relations, which are becoming increasingly litigious with the signing of each league’s collective bargaining agreements.

“To transcend fashion, we must transcend beauty.” Queer fashion is dawning on a renaissance, but it’s not all “androgynous” joggers and a-line tees. It’s much more complex and at the root of SXSW’s first ever queer style panel, Queer Style: Visual Activism and Fashion’s Frontier.

Celebrity product endorsements: when stars you love slap on a fake smile to get cheerful about whatever goods they're schilling. Thankfully, one global phenomenon feels no need to plaster on a forced grin. The feline arbiter of all things awful that is Grumpy Cat returns to Austin for another hateful year.

Just as important as planning your SXSW calendar of panels and parties? Planning how to get there, and how to get home or back to the hotel in one piece.