Chestnut Reigns Supreme at the 2007 World French-Fry-Eating Championship

The 2007 World French-Fry-Eating Championship at Bikinis Bar & Grill started off smooth enough. As a Neil Diamond song drifted from the speakers into a healthy crowd, the competitors were announced, as were the many foods they have ingested competitively: beans, hot dogs, Krystal burgers, chicken wings, waffles, meatballs, grilled cheese, Spam, and, inexplicably, deep-fried asparagus. There was "Crazy Legs" Conti, aka the "Houdini of Cuisini," who holds titles for string beans, pancakes, and Twinkies; "Nasty" Nate Biller, who placed first in last fall's Corny Dog Eating Championship; rising star Tim "Eater X" Janus, dressed in a sexy yellow bikini; Seaver "the Achiever" Miller, an actual firefighter; and 23-year-old Joey Chestnut, the favored winner, currently ranked second in the world by the International Federation of Competitive Eating.

With glasses of water in front of them, the competitors had 10 minutes to eat as many french fries as they could. It was all about technique as several dipped the fries in the water to soften them, while Chestnut used his hands to knead the fries into a doughy mass before stuffing them in his maw. The transfixing San Jose, Calif., resident never let up, finishing an entire platter before another was delivered by the Bikinis girls. In the end, there was only one casualty, an eater who retreated to a nearby tree to dry heave. Chip "Burger" Simpson placed third with four pounds, six ounces, Tim "Eater X" Janus placed second with five, and Chestnut took the title with an astounding five pounds eight ounces of french fry devoured. That's basically like eating a newborn baby. Girl, you'll be a woman soon.