From the Vaults: Friday the 13th – Jason vs. Steve

Jason X

Steve Davis has reviewed Friday the 13th movies in song, sound effects, and verse. Hatchet jobs puts it mildly.

"From betwixt my fingers peered
exactly what my soul had feared.
To the bone, a nerve shoots chilling,
Jason on a rampage killing.
There is no God, there is no heaven,
It's back: Friday the 13th, Part VII."

We compiled the lot of Steve's reviews in our Year Thirty project: 30 Favorite Movie Bombs. Steve's reviews comprise Nos. 26-30.

Back in the early years of the Chronicle, editor Scott Bowles began the sadistic tradition of assigning Steve Davis to review every Friday the 13th movie, and we have to say, Steve rose to the task with perverse gusto. Beginning in 1984 with the cruelly titled Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter to 2002 with Jason X, Steve dutifully eviscerated the franchise, along with his lifelong tormentor Scott Bowles. Steve fled town, however, when chapter IX, Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday, came out in 1993, but that gave me a chance to relate the whole history of Jason vs. Steve vs. Scott.

Other titles put through Steve's meat grinder include Friday the 13th: Part V – A New Beginning, Friday the 13th: Part VII – The New Blood in verse, excerpted above), and Friday the 13th: Part VIII – Jason Takes Manhattan. Happy Friday the 13th, y'all.