First Impressions Are Crucial

Allow myself to introduce...myself. Here are a few fun facts about me: 

I am a charismatic and obsequious young man whose shiny personality captivates those around me, but most of all myself

My favorite sounds are puppies and children playing under a rainbow

I enjoy speaking in strange accents for no apparent reason

I enjoy choosing extra-crunchy peanut butter because I think it "keeps me real"

I prefer understanding to confusion, art to science and Betty to Veronica

I sometimes think wisdom can be found coming from the mouths of children, but understand that most of the time it is just incoherent babbling that must be stopped at all cost

I walk with a limp although I have no injury, in order to gain pity from strangers passing by

At times I eat with my left hand just to make sure my right hand doesn’t get to cocky

But most of all, I love myself - so much that sometimes I get a rash

 All right.  Truth it is.  I am 39 and turning 40 this month (BTW, big party coming up so pencil it in the calendar).  For some reason I think that when a person is 40 years old, they should be sort of a grown up man.  Right?

 Well, in addition to all of the other challenges and restraining orders I am dealing with, my inability to keep queso fries out of my mouth and somehow make use of one of the many gym membership to which I have subscribed seems to be one of the biggest.

 So here we are.  I refuse to have Oprah moments. I will sometimes\oftentimes show up for training hung-over or even still buzzed. But I promise you this, people of the interweb. I will show up and do my best.  I will share my experiences here with candor and honesty.  And I will try and keep my whining to a minimum.

 And I will see YOU at the finish line.

 You don't know me, but that last line was to be read with a knowing wink.