Someone's Confused 'Job Fair' With 'Casting Call'

From the "you've got to be shitting me" files:

Star-eyed dreamers, here's your chance to get that dream-job you've always wanted – as a barback or bathroom attendant. How much does holding-back Paris Hilton's hair while she purges pay? This from Chronic's inbox:

PANGAEA AUSTIN SEEKING SPECIAL PEOPLE TO MAKE NEW NIGHT SPOT HOT

Documentary Cameras Will Roll During Casting Call for Positions from Managers to Musicians

WHAT: Media is invited to attend and cover Pangaea Austin's casting call for positions at the new nightclub, which opens this fall in the city's Warehouse District. [Here's a taste of what we could be in for – ed.]

Being sought are operations managers, day and night managers, comptroller, bookkeeper, wait staff, bartenders, VIP host, doormen, security guards, DJs, dancers, drummers and other musicians, graphic designers, promotional models, corporate events and marketing personnel, lighting and audio technicians, bar backs, bus boys, porters, and bathroom attendants.

During the casting call, documentary cameras will capture this important phase in the making of Pangaea.

WHEN: 5-7pm Thursday, October 11

WHERE: Pangaea, now under construction at 409 Colorado St.

WHO: AVAILABLE FOR PHOTOS, INTERVIEWS & SOUND BITES

Michael Ault, creator of Pangaea and the impresario who brought the bottle-club service concept to the United States clubs in clubs with such famous names as Spy, Chaos, Gryphon, MercBar and Privé -- some of the most exclusive, most celebrated, most-written about clubs in the world.

Managers and staff members already hired, including musicians and brightly costumed dancers and drummers.

WHY: "Making of Pangaea" documentary could become a TV reality show [And monkeys could fly outta my ass – ed.]

When it opens, Pangaea will be Austin's first ultra lounge fully devoted to the philosophy of bottle service -- and designed with an exotic tribal-safari style to transport guests to another time and place ("somewhere they haven't been," says Ault.)

And, save a select L.A. transplant or two, someplace they'll never go.