More Great 'Chronicle' Gift Ideas

Since our first round of suggestions got the blogosphere going nuts, here's another round of last-minute gift ideas, leading up to our print-edition extravaganza tomorrow. Suck it, secular humanists!

Shop WorldNetDaily: Aside from being a platform for black helicopter paranoia, standing firm against the nefarious homosexual/tofu agenda, and fanning Chuck Norris' literary flames, this winger-site par excellence offers plenty of ways to ruin the holidays. Their "Operation: Just Say... Merry Christmas" bracelets are an inexpensive way to remind loved ones that the season of peace on earth means nothing less than outright spiritual warfare. But WND doesn't totally hate the Jews – they need Israel to fulfill biblical prophecy and bring about the Antichrist, remember – so they've prepared a "The Gift of Chanukah" DVD. For their Muslim friends, WND offers… ha, we had you going there!

NukAlert: At all times, the Right must be vigilant in the war against Islamofascinazipinkonmulticulturalism. Who knows where you'll be when a dirty bomb's detonated – blogging from the front lines in the GWOT, in the bunker some call your Grandmother's basement, or, God forbid, on a Wasabi Funyuns and Mr. Pibb refueling mission. Well now there's NukAlert, the only $160 keychain authorized by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security's Office of Domestic Preparedness.