All-Star Rap

I'm a hoops junkie. I grew up watching Jayhawk basketball in Allen Fieldhouse, drove to Waco last week to watch Kansas take out Baylor, attended the Final Four in San Antonio last April, and am more emotionally invested in strangers throwing a ball through a hole than could ever be rationalized.

This weekend Lebron, Kobe, and the rest of the NBA best will play a meaningless game in Phoenix. What's the difference between this All-Star Game and the one played 20 years ago? Aside from the shorts being half a foot longer, it's a safe bet Kool Keith won't be rapping about the lineup during the introductions. Shame, that is. You remember Keith, of course. He gave Bump & Hustle some colorful quotes before Fun Fun Fun Fest and talked with our own Audra Schroeder about the No Sweatpants Coalition.

In 1989, he traded verses with fellow Ultramagnetic MC Ced-Gee about every player, coach, and trainer at the All-Star Game. With a dozen players on each team, that makes for nearly ten minutes worth of bars about ballin'. Better yet, the starting lineup is saved for last so there's about five minutes of raps about players today's casual fan has never heard of. In a word, genius. Whether you're a hoops junkie, hip-hop head, or simply a member of the No Sweatpants Coalition you're sure to enjoy Dr. Octo dropping gems about Tom Chambers, Mark Eaton, and Kevin Duckworth.