Gay Place: Total Gayhem

Kumbia Queers (see Friday and Saturday)

Well, hello, gaywads. How are you surviving our town and our time of classic overstimulation? Well rest assured, that if you find yourself in a state of panic attack, your people are around just about every corner of this town. How to find them? Read this column, and check out our 2014 SXSW special version of the gAyTX Fun Guide. Print versions featuring listings like these – plus a map of local gay bars – are available all over. NOTE: If it's marked SXSW, it requires credentials. See much more online at austinchronicle.com/gay – up-to-date event listings, reviews, interviews, gossip, pics, and chat throughout the fest. Queer questions about the gAyTX may be sent to [email protected].

on our GAYDAR

OUTLANDER FEST Over 30 bands: Will Sheridan, Big Dipper, Katey Red, Cakes da Killa, Gina Chavez, Lisa Marshall, Hey Moonshaker, Idgy Dean, among others, playing in the heart of the gay district. Tue.-Sat., March 11-15. Oilcan Harry's, 211 W. Fourth. Free. www.facebook.com/theoutlanderproject.

SOUTH FRY SOUTH FRIENDY'S Wed.-Thu., March 12-13. Chain Drive, 504 Willow.

SXSW: 'AUSTIN CHRONICLE' PRESENTS: 'HAIR OF THE 3-LEGGED DOG' Honor Chrondog Hank, friend of the Gay Place and pals. Enjoy free refreshments (aka booze). Thu., March 13, noon-4pm. The Liberty, 1618½ E. Sixth. Free. austinchronicle.com/dayparty.

GRETCHEN PHILLIPS & JO WALSTON Just two nice country gospel grrlz. Thu., March 13, 2pm. Austin Public Library, 800 Guadalupe. www.gretchen-phillips.com.

THE RAWK SHOW ART EXHIBIT Visual art created by artists associated with rawwwwk. March 6-15, 7-10pm. Romani Gallery, 1900 E. 12th. www.facebook.com/therawkshow.

SXSW MUSIC: PERFUME GENIUS Thu., March 13, 9pm. St. David's Sanctuary, 301 E. Eighth.

SXSW MUSIC: SHARON NEEDLES Just say yes. Sharon is carin'. Thu., March 13, 10pm. The Iron Bear, 121 W. Eighth. www.sharonneedles.com.

SXSW MUSIC: MELISSA ETHERIDGE The prez of the lez. Thu., March 13, 11pm. Paramount, 713 Congress. www.melissaetheridge.com.

SXSW MUSIC: NO JOY Thu., March 13, 11pm. Maggie Mae's, 323 E. Sixth; and Fri., March 14, 12mid. Swan Dive, 615 Red River. www.nojoymusic.com.

SXSW MUSIC: WYE OAK Wye Oak? Wye not? On the Merge bill with Ex-Hex, Bob Mould, and more. Thu., March 13, 11:45pm-12:25am. Parish, 214 E. Sixth. www.wyeoakmusic.com.

SXSW MUSIC: KELIS This bossy, brassy babe brings all the boys to the shows. Thu., March 13, 12mid. Clive Bar, 609 Davis. www.ninjatune.net/artist/kelis.

DEEP INSIDE: SXAFTERHOURS Room rentals. Clothing optional. DJ Mark Louque (P-Town) and C-Bass and Mouthfeel. Fri., March 14, 2am (technically, Saturday morning). Midtowne Spa, 5815 Airport, 512/302-9696. www.facebook.com/mouthfeelatx.

SXSW MUSIC: CYRIL HAHN Say his name... say his name, and he'll remix your destiny, child. Fri., March 14. Empire, 606 E. Seventh. www.cyrilhahnmusic.com.

GIRLS ROCK CAMP DAY PARTY Sick/Sea, Buffalo Daughter, BLXPLTN, Mirah, Charlie Belle Music, Butch County, and more. Fri., March 14, 11am. Cherrywood Coffeehouse, 1400 E. 38½. www.girlsrockcampaustin.org.

SXSW FILM: LITTLE HORRIBLES: MINIBAR Fri., March 14, 11am. Stateside at the Paramount, 719 Congress. www.littlehorribles.com.

SPIN DAY PARTY Against Me! and so many more. Fri., March 14, 11am-5pm. Stubb's, 801 Red River. www.againstme.net.

SUGAR CIRCUS SIDESHOWCASE The greatest acoustic Side Showcase on Earth (with beer and vegan cupcakes, y mas). Fri., March 14, 2-8pm. Sugar Circus, 2613 E. Fifth. www.sugarcircusatx.com.

SXSW MUSIC: PHANTOGRAM Hip-pop don't stop with this funky fresh duo. Fri., March 14, 5pm. Mohawk, 912 Red River. www.phantogrammusic.virb.com.

SX NORTH LAMAR The power of women in music. Fri., March 14, 6-10pm. BookWoman, 5501 N. Lamar Ste. 105-A. Free. www.facebook.com/bookwomanaustin.

SXSW FILM: THE CASE AGAINST 8 Fri., March 14, 6:45pm. Stateside at the Paramount, 719 Congress. www.thecaseagainst8.com.

Bonaparte's Mad Kate (with Xs) performs with HYENAZ (see Sunday) (Photo by Devaki Knowles)

SXSW MUSIC: KATEY RED AND NOLA BOUNCE It's a night of bounce, featuring Game Ova Hound, Magnolia Rhome, Lucky (Johnson from Treme), Killy Keys, and, of course, the Beyoncé of bounce, Katey Red. Fri., March 14, 7pm. Avenue on Congress, 408 Congress. www.katey-red.blogspot.com.

SXSW MUSIC: AMY COOK Fri., March 14, 8pm. Bungalow, 92 Rainey. www.amycook.com.

A CLUB CALLED RHONDA: CLOSE ENCOUNTERS Pansexual Party Palace. Fri., March 14, 9pm. Empire, 422 E. Sixth. www.rhondaintlwww.rhondasays.net.

SXSW MUSIC: BEN AQUA Beat your mea ... oops, we mean "feet." Fri., March 14, 9pm. Silhouette, 718 Congress. www.benaqua.org.

SXSW MUSIC: KUMBIA QUEERS TropiPunk from Mexico y Argentina. Fri., March 14, 9pm. Flamingo Cantina, 515 E. Sixth and Sat., March 15, 11pm. Russian House, 307 E. Fifth. www.kumbiaqueers.com.ar.

SXSW MUSIC: YAMANTAKA//SONIC TITAN Perf artists Alaska B and Ruby Kato Attwood. Fri., March 14, 10:45pm. Hotel Vegas, 1500 E. Sixth. www.ytstlabs.com.

SXSW MUSIC: MARY LAMBERT Mary, Mary extraoridinary shall keep us all very warm. Fri., March 14, 11:10pm. Victorian Room at the Driskill, 604 Brazos. www.marylambertsings.com.

SXSW MUSIC: WHEELCHAIR SPORTS CAMP Queer, disabled social justice MC/producer rapper Kalyn. Fri., March 14, 11:45pm. 408 E. Sixth. www.wheelchairsportscamp.co.

SXSW MUSIC: LITTLE BOOTS All big beats, no whammies. Fri., March 14, 1am. Karma Lounge, 119 W. Eighth. www.littlebootsmusic.co.uk.

SXSW MUSIC: VOCKAH REDU Bounce's crown prince. Fri., March 14, 1am. Hotel Vegas, 1500 E. Sixth. www.vockah.com.

PEREZ HILTON'S ONE NIGHT IN AUSTIN 2014 Perez brings the party like he do each March. Sat., March 15. Austin Music Hall, 5pm.

BRIGHT FUTURES DAY PARTY Afternoon "tea" (aka booze and food) at Austin's beloved house of wig, etc. Sat., March 15, 11:30am. Maison d'Etoile, 2109 E. Cesar Chavez, 512/344-9173. www.maisondetoile.com.

LOVE. ON THE LAWN SX Jitterbug Vipers, Carolyn Wonderland, Wendy Colonna, Patrice Pike, Hedda Layne, Ginger Leigh, Gina Chavez, and more. Sat., March 15, noon-9pm. Central Market North, 4001 N. Lamar, 512/206-1000. $10 suggested donation. www.facebook.com/love.austintexas.

HAND DRAWN RECORDS PRESENTS Sat., March 15, 2pm-2am. Brass House, 115-B San Jacinto. Free. www.handdrawnrecords.com.

UGLYFEST Bumping Uglies presents Bipolar Gentlemen, MC Sweet Tea, the Pizza Underground, Total Unicorn, and more. Sat., March 15, 2pm-2am. Chain Drive, 504 Willow, 512/480-9017.

SUX BY SUXWEST 4 Over 50 acts tweaked to melt your root canals and dingle your berries. Sat.-Sun., March 15-16, 4pm-12mid. Romani Gallery, 1900 E. 12th. www.facebook.com/austin.noise.

SXSW MUSIC: GRETCHEN'S DISCO PLAGUE (IT'S INFECTIOUS!) Reigning meowtricarch of Austin lez supreme fronts a disco throng of superstar improv wisenheimers. Sat., March 15, 8pm. Cheer Up Charlie's, 900 Red River. www.gretchen-phillips.com.

SXSW MUSIC: Y'ALL OR NOTHING One of the conference's best line-ups: Sharon Needles, Big Dipper, Lemz, HYENAZ, Crooked Bangs, Wild Moccasins, AB Soto, BLXPLTN, Christeene, Magic Mouth, and DJ C-Bass. Sat., March 15, 8pm. Cheer Up Charlie's, 900 Red River. www.cheerupcharlies.com.

SXSW MUSIC: SUZANNE VEGA It is always nice to see her, says the queer behind the counter. Sat., March 15, 10:30pm. Central Presbyterian Church, 200 E. Eighth. www.suzannevega.com.

SXSW MUSIC: GARY NUMAN The principal of pleasure is back. Accept no replicas. Sat., March 15, 12:30am. Elysium, 705 Red River.

SXSW MUSIC: CHRISTEENE Like the Eighties prop-comic Gallagher, SeaWorld whales, and GG Allin combined, Austin's most adorable little guttersnipe should come with a splash guard, or at the very least, free rubber ponchos. Sat., March 15, 1am. Cheer Up Charlie's, 900 Red River. www.christeenemusic.com.

GAYBIGAYGAY 2014 New digs! Right next to Sahara Lounge on the Eastside: BLXPLTN, HYENAZ (featuring Bonaparte dancer Mad Kate), Mykki Blanco, Cakes da Killa, Christeene, MonoKino, Magic Mouth, Kumbia Queers (y Queer Qumbia SF y en Tejas), Phoebe Jean & Her Air Force (from Baltimore), Las Crudas, Jeff Barbara, Molly Fischer & Amanda, Thelma & the Sleaze (from Nashville), Mom Jeans, DJ Pre-Columbian, y mas. All day; all gay! All yay! Sun., March 16, noon-12mid. 1405 Webberville Rd. Free and open to the public. All ages. www.gaybigaygay.com.

TUEZGAYZ Dependably fruitastic: Austin's legendary weekly weekday gay night. Tuesdays, 9pm. Barbarella, 615 Red River. www.facebook.com/Barbarellaatx.

HEDWIG & THE ANGRY INCH Join Lambda for this post-Spring Break, post-SXSW chill. Wed., March 19, 7pm. LBJ Student Center, 601 University Dr., San Marcos. www.facebook.com/groups/lambdaoftxstate.