Public Notice

A coupla weeks ago -- or perhaps months -- U2 activist-boy (not-Sonny) Bono was featured in a story in Rolling Stone magazine. The piece wasn't about a new album or hairdo, it was about the gazillion-selling pop singer's latest crusade, the Jubilee 2000 Coalition. The coalition is a group of politicos and pop-culture-types (including The Bone, Quincy Jones, and Bob Geldolf) united to encourage world leaders to forgive the debts of HIPCs (Highly Indebted Poor Countries), impoverished nations of the Third World, by the year 2000. Not surprisingly, people are all over the map on this issue: Many libs don't see what the big deal is. Why collect debt from countries we are just going to send support to anyway? Forgive it, already. Most conservatives, however, fiercely hold fast to the idea that forgiving debt flies in the face of the principles of capitalism. And the rest of the world turns, hungry, scratching its head, trying to figure out if there are any across the board "principles" in fetid notions like capitalism--.

Anyhooooo, we like Bono, okay? Despite his pontificating, despite his rockstar facade, and despite his "cause of the month" posturing, we think it is a-OK, groovy cool for a huge meglomaniacal pop icon to peddle influence, especially when that influence is inspired by strong beliefs as opposed to fast-track buck raking and trendsetting. Say what you will about the at-times ponytailed poseur, but if all that heart is just an act -- well, we'll eat our Y2K party hats. What struck us most about this article, however, had little to do with big world issues like national debts. What struck us hit much closer to home.

When Bono says, "All these millennium celebrations, it's going to be like Louis XIV --. It's just going to be: Up drawbridge, we're all in the castle, and we're pissing over a moat of champagne on the poorest of the poor. And I don't want to be part of that," we don't either.

Hey, who does? If you're like us, you scraped good and hard and long for that pricey bottle of bubbly, and we'll be damned if we are going to piss in it before it has a chance to cycle through our systems at least once. This week marks the last episode of "Public Notice" of 1999. Aren't you just so sick and tired of all that "-- of the millennium!!!" or " -- of the century!!!" crap (as if "of 1999" isn't bad enough)? But ends of years are significant, not to mention great times to ask life's important questions and ponder life's elusive mysteries. Those who follow the follies of Austin's public service community through "Public Notice" know of our penchant for the peculiar, our tenderness for the twisted, our soft spot for the strange. Perhaps this pensive time of year has inspired you to ask "Why?"

Why are those "Public Notice" types such weirdos?

We can't give you a concise answer, really (because we are not that self-aware --), but we can tell you that it might have to do with the fact that we spend a lot of time alone.

This might explain why we are so damned happy that this particular issue of The Austin Chronicle is dedicated to folks stuck in the well of loneliness on New Year's Eve. Needless to say, we can totally relate to the poor pathetic losers home alone for the holidays. Hey, we've been there, man, and it looks like that's where we are headed this year, as well.

Who hasn't spent at least one major holiday alone? We've been known to take advantage of the slowing of traffic and the dissipation of the crowds to enjoy such mundane tasks as laundry or scarfing free pecans on the sidewalk or finding lost golfballs on the very days and nights that the rest of the world is popping corks and toasting good times.

Don't feel sorry for us. We revel in it.

But you know, time away from the mad, mad crowd doesn't always have to suck. Time alone can rule. It can change your perspective on the planet. It can drop blood pressure to safe levels. It can make you treasure what you don't have right at that instant, right at your fingertips. It can make you love people all over again.

With all of the millennial Y2K hysteria, take a moment or two (in between collecting a few tubfuls of potable water -- ) and think to yourself "If it all cut loose at 12 midnight, December 31, 1999/January 1, 2000, would it be that bad? Would it suck that hard?" Couldn't we all handle just a little more time alone for reflection?

No? Okay, we'll see you at the party. Just no pissing in the punch, okay?

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Much love for new times from your pals at "Public Notice."